Absurdist Books I Wrote or Am Writing

(IMAGE: new McDonald's  

under construction at University

and War Memorial in Peoria, IL)

(1) Build Your Dream Home for $1.49

(2) How To Succeed at Anything By Doing Nothing At All

(3) Sleep and Get Rich: The More You Sleep, The More Money You Make

(4) Slightly Positive Affirmations: The Timid Auto-suggestion System

(5) I'm Rococo, You're Rococo

(6) 30 Ways to Twist a Paper Clip Into a Radio Antenna

(7) Dream Recording and Playback Systems: A User's Guide

(8) Make Money With Childish Art That Poses As Primitive

(9) Abstract Hyper-maximalism and The School of Insobriety

(10) Be Your Own Mental Butler

(11) I Don't Feel Like Doing That: A Manual for Underachievers

(12) Floppy Disk Microfiche: Brave New World of Data Storage and Retrieval

(13) How To Be Pretty Much Like Everybody Else: A Primer in Strict Conformism

(14) 30 Exciting Games You Can Play with Pillows

(15) We Keep Getting Stranger: A Guide to Asocial Media

(16) Blaming, Bashing, Bewildering: Secrets of Professional Politicking