Sunday, August 26, 2012

New Tech Neologisms for Internet Computer People

Please start using these carefully coined phrases to replace the commonly used terms. Together, as a people united, we can Occupy Tech Language.

(1) Compu-chumming (instead of "social media")
(2) Infinite library (instead of "internet search")
(3) Actionoid (instead of "widget")
(4) Stickers (instead of "tags")
(5) Electro-note (instead of "email")
(6) Digital effluvium boat (instead of "website")
(7) Oneiric Eric (instead of "entrepreneur")
(8) Macro-beamed (instead of "viral")
(9) Coordinates (instead of "URL")
(10) Servomechanism loop (instead of "comment")
(11) Loquacious signal path (instead of "online conversation")
(12) Abend (abnormal end) (instead of "crash")
(13) Porta-chine (instead of "cell phone" or "mobile device")
(14) Mist meandering (instead of "cloud computing")
(15) Information superhighway car (instead of "web browser")
(16) Biz embryo (instead of "start-up")

I went to the infinite library in my information superhighway car to do some compu-chumming and there, in my loquacious signal path was a servo-mechanism loop from an old high school buddy, who is now an oneiric eric, living in California. He said his new biz embryo has been macro-beamed, and he gave me the coordinates of his digital effluvium boat. I was mist meandering on my porta-chine but one of my actionoids caused an abend, before I could sticker it. I sent him an electro-note telling him I'd like to know more.

PHOTO ABOVE: Soon everyone will have a computer in their home. Mothers and daughters will be able to keep track of food inventories and send out invitations to parties with great speed and ease. Imagine all the free time you'll have once you install a Jumbomat X25 in your domicile.

1 comment:


My email address is I am not cowardly, nor do I have any reason to want to be anonymous. My opinion does not matter, as I have no website or blog, and for other reasons as well. However, it is a fact, not an opinion, that the word "abend" has been around for decades. Thus, it is not a "neologism". (That last statement qualifies as an opinion, since whether or not a multiple-decade-old word qualifies as a neologism is indeed a matter of opinion: how new is neo?)
--Carl Mantzel