Your "Bio/About" text on MySpace Music Artist pages is very important. Many times, musicians skip this field. In doing so, they miss an opportunity to connect with fans by sharing a little background, history, or philosophy of the music.
But there are some bands who go too far. They go on and on and on. I will not quote these Bios, for they take up too much room in a blog post. Most web users don't want to swim through a freaking novel, just to learn a bit about a band. Still, too much information can be scanned swiftly, or ignored, while no information just leaves a gaping hole in your page.
As I've stated repeatedly, I prefer short, informative Bios written in a serious, scholarly manner...or completely bizarre and funny Bios.
It depends on your style of music and your personality. What annoys me are long, self-obsessed Bios that provide every little detail of a musician's career, yet the music itself is rather ordinary and not all that great to begin with. It sounds pompous for a run-of-the-mill musician to rant on and on about all their accomplishments and collaborations and concerts and label switchings.
I personally have started creating new MySpace Music Artist pages as science fiction scenarios, starting with my Wainwrights of the Mind. The music and the story behind this band are provided as comical science fiction. I won't quote it, but you can visit the page. I use text, video, and photos to complete the absurd narrative.
Wainwrights of the Mind on MySpace Music.
Now let's look at some clever Bios.
(1) Glowing Dinosaurs
Formed in 1905, by three three-year-olds. Dean, Max, and David have since reunited in this year 2010 for a special performance. Profiling some of their classics from the 1930's and 40's. These songs were recorded live in front of no-one.
(2) Aaron Spectre
born and raised in the middle of massachusetts, usa. drums & bass. heavily influenced by the then-growing hardcore movement, all ages shows in worcester & clinton. moved to new york city in 1999 and got into jungle, d&b, ambient. moved to berlin in 2003 and began touring the world making music. currently working on the next drumcorps album.
(3) Justice Porcupine
I just live inside my head, oh well I feel that justice is a porcupine with no particular goal in mind just guts and claws and spines I feel myself forgetting how to talk.
(4) Turbulence Theory
It started after a great untold war between God and Satan. The two battled for nearly two centuries with the best powers they could possibly summon. In the end God prevailed, but what was left behind was the knowing of the minds of God and Satan could master.
Until one day three adventurers bent on discovering something ancient came upon this power and immediately seized everything it could muster. This power came to be known as Turbulence Theory. The rest is history...
(5) Disposable Man
In a last ditch attempt to make sense of a lunatic world, Disposable Man was formed - screaming & mewling - out of the heads of two people who really ought to know better. We shan't mention them again. Taking as its spring-board the hideous legacy of Thatcher, the eternal yearning mystery of the Mellotron Mk2 & a smattering of vaudevillian angst, Disposable Man takes a dive into the corporate middle management slush pit of modern life.
(6) Robert Fripp
Best known for his work with the seminal rock group King Crimson, guitarist Robert Fripp has a long history of groundbreaking collaborations and making decisive contributions to records by a diverse of artists including Blondie, The Orb, Talking Heads, The Damned, Robert Wyatt, Daryl Hall, The Future Sound of London, The Roches, Andy Summers, David Bowie, Brian Eno, The Stranglers, David Sylvian, Peter Gabriel, No Man and more recently Porcupine Tree, Jakko Jakszyk and jazz player, Theo Travis.
He has also worked extensively as a solo artist, releasing many solo albums and touring initially with Frippertronics (developed from Brian Eno’s tape delay system) during the late 70s and more recently Soundscapes – a process he describes as the best way he knows to make a lot of noise with one guitar. Robert maintains an online diary over at DGMLive where you can also find several concerts from his soundscape and churchscape tours available for purchase.
(7) Chaos Butterfly
Chaos Butterfly is a band that stretches the boundaries of genre. the people that have played in the band have from various musical backgrounds spanning from Camper Van Beethoven and the Meredith Monk Ensemble to the opera and the orchestra to free improvisation and electronica to the Cirque du Soleil.
They incorporate several computers, singing, violins, guitars, wine glasses, etc. In concert they present a combination of outside improvisation and twisted song compositions, collaborating with a variety of special guests.
In 2005, a duo of Chaos Butterfly also composed and performed with the Deborah Slater Dance Theater, including the month-long run of the show “Hotel of Memories” in San Francisco in May of 2006.
(8) Fifty Foot Hose
Released: 1967/Limelight In 1967, San Francisco’s Fifty Foot Hose were certainly one of the innovators of a sound that took Psychedelia to new heights and was captured on the band’s one record, “Cauldron”. Band leader, Cork Marcheschi, used homemade electronic devices to create crude and experimental soundscapes and instrumental compostitions that were sprinkled throughout the album.
However, these passages are not characteristic of the whole albums. “Cauldron” passes through many other styles, which include Folk & Jazz and is anchored by Nancy Blossom’s Grace Slick-esque vocals, creating a wholly unique listening experience. In addition to his work sculpting, Cork Marcheschi brought the Hose back to the public eye for a new record in 1996 and still performs periodically.
(9) The Leonard Coen Brothers
The Leonard Coen Brothers formed when musical journeyman Mike Leonard Coen met his musical brother Mal Leonard Coen over a few Boags Honey Porters. Mike and Mal Leonard-Coen...Just like men, but more so.
(10) Flying Saucer Attack
[NOTE: They quote 3 different sources in their Bio text: All Music Guide, Wikipedia, and Domino Records. This is unique and quite smart. Let others rave about you, eh? I quote here the All Music Guide only, to conserve space. "New Lands" is their best, most innovative album, btw.]
Formed in Bristol, England in 1993, the elusive avant-noise project Flying Saucer Attack primarily comprised the duo of singers/guitarists David Pearce and Rachel Brook, refugees from the group Lynda's Strange Vacation who formed FSA as an outlet for their interest in home-recording experimentation.
Drawing influence from Krautrock, folk, and dream pop, they emerged with the single "Soaring High," followed by an eponymously-titled 1993 debut LP which buried the group's narcoleptic vocals and amorphous songs under dense, organic sheets of feedback.
After 1994's Distance, a collection of atmospheric singles and unreleased material, FSA returned in 1995 with Further, a remarkably evocative work which transported the group's hypnotic guitar wash into a uniquely pastoral setting.
Chorus, another singles compilation, followed later in the year, and with it came a declaration of the end of the group's initial phase, setting the stage for Flying Saucer Attack's continued evolution as one of the decade's most innovative and ambitious groups.
1997's New Lands was the first fruit of this new FSA, now a Pearce solo project exploring the possibilities of sampling; Brook, meanwhile, focused on her side group Movietone, a similarly blissed-out excursion into sound. FSA followed up New Lands three years later with Mirror.
(11) Eat Static
Eat Static were formed in 1989 by Merv Pepler and Joie Hinton, then drummer and synth player respectively for the band Ozric Tentacles. They were joined by Steve Everitt, a library musician and occasional Ozric member.
The band made a name for themselves on the Megadog/'live' techno scene of the early '90s, playing alongside the likes of Orbital, Underworld and Aphex Twin. They were the first signings to Megadog-offshoot Planet Dog records, releasing their debut album 'Abduction' in 1993.
In 1994 Steve Everitt retired from the group's live performances, though he has continued to collaborate in the studio. Since then the band have played hundreds of gigs worldwide and become one the most respected and spectacular live dance acts around.
They have been voted 'Best Dance Act' in the NME, achieved a top twenty album, headlined the first dance tent at Glastonbury in 1995 and recorded two Peel sessions.
Whilst essentially a sci-fi influenced, trance/techno outfit, they have also incorporated drum and bass, breakbeat, latin, garage and ambient styles into their sound at various stages.
the past few years the band have become heavily involved with the psy-trance scene, playing parties and festivals the world over and releasing numerous tracks on trance compilations. Merv has also recently collaborated with the likes of Steve Jolliffe (Tangerine Dream), Will White (Propellerheads) and Simon Posford (Hallucinogen).
In addition, Joie plays with Here & Now, Zubzub (with ex-Ozrics bassist Zia) and Dream Machine (alongside former Ozric flautist Jumping John). Both Joie and Merv also occasionally play live with Ozrics leader Ed Wynne under the guise of Nodens Ictus and have recently been playing with the Ozrics again.
Eat Static released their long-awaited new album 'De-Classified' through Solstice Music in July 2007. In February 2008 it was announced that Joie would be leaving the group in order to spend more time with his family.
Now going it alone, Merv released a downtempo Eat Static album entitled 'Back to Earth' in July 2008, followed by a string of festival appearances. The next project will be a break-beat orientated album under the name Dendron (the follow up to 2003's 'Supernatural Jazz') Watch this (my)space for more details...
(12) Trevor Goronwy
Trefor Goronwy joined This Heat in 1982 to replace Gareth Williams as bassist/vocalist after the latter had quit the band, and played on their last European tour.
After a brief hiatus, he and Stephen Rickard joined Charles Hayward in the studio to work on what was originally to be a Hayward solo project. As things progressed the venture took on more and more of a collaborative nature, and the recordings were ultimately released as Meridian by Camberwell Now .
Several years and several recordings later, when the band finally split up, Trefor withdrew into himself somewhat, recording and making increasingly infrequent live performances under a variety of names, often producing an entirely new set of work which would only ever be performed on one occasion.
Soon he began to work as a sound technician, which would lead on to involvements with artists such as Pere Ubu, Momus, The Band of Holy Joy, David Thomas and the Two Pale Boys, Spearmint (in an earlier incarnation), and Towering Inferno, among others. Early on in this period Trefor went on several tours of the former Soviet Union, and it was during one of these tours that he realised that he was more interested in the language, culture and history of the countries themselves than in what he was supposed to be doing, so he decided to enrol on a degree course in Russian Studies in London.
Another consequence of his travels was his subsequent involvement with the Tuvan musicians, Huun-Huur-Tu after meeting Albert Kuvezin (now of Yat-Kha) in a bar in Novosibirsk, Siberia, during a music festival. They exchanged telephone numbers and agreed to meet up should either end up in the other’s neck of the woods (which seemed like a remote possibility at the time). Soon, however Huun-Huur-Tu found themselves in Wales, having represented Tuva at the International Eisteddfod in Llangollen, and a call was made.
They had time to kill and nowhere to go and Trefor had a spare room in London. He also had access to a 24-track studio which was unbooked for a weekend. The recordings they made were touted around, and were ultimately released as Huun-Huur-Tu’s first album, Sixty Horses in My Herd. On their departure, the Tuvans left behind a somewhat battered igil, which Trefor eventually restored and began to play.
This led to an interest in the possibilities of Asian spike-fiddles in general (to which category both the igil and the erhu (which he had already been playing in Camberwell Now)) belong. After three years spent living in Moscow, Trefor returned to London, and, having married a citizen of Kazakhstan, it was only a matter of time before he added a kobyz (a relative of the Tuvan igil) to his collection. Trefor has been making recordings prominently featuring these instruments for some time, and the first results of these endeavours are at last appearing here.
(13) Renaldo M
Renaldo Malpractice aka Brian Poole was one half of Renaldo and the Loaf who were signed to Ralph Records (USA) and Some Bizarre (UK) in the 80s - RATL released 4 albums until calling it a day in 1988. Since then Renaldo has continued, albeit VERY slowly, to produce music at his computer based home studio gathering a catalogue of unfinished/nascent songs. However spurred on by various friends and requests to collaborate on specific projects some songs have been finished.
Over the past couple of years Renaldo has been working with the Portsmouth band, Autons, to realise his cover version of the Kink's See My Friends has been encouraged to perform live for the first time in over 25 years.... more recently still indulging in 'laptronica', dipping his toe into the world of live sample mixing.
Most notably however is that 2006 saw the reunion of Renaldo and Ted the Loaf leading to a collaboration on a retrospective Renaldo and the Loaf project and, tantilisingly, new material.
(14) Taffy Giraffe
Rolling in the Sugar Cane fields of the my Home Planet - Glucosia! I sometimes allow my advisors (Ducky, Tipsy Bunny, and PeeSquak) to look through my accounts. I trust them with popsicles, ice cream and caramel but NOT with chocolate.
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