Sunday, January 19, 2014

How To Write Ads for Imaginary Products: EXAMPLE 4

Scram Patrol Dog Zapper Raygun shoots a thin stream of high pitched screeching sounds with pinpoint accuracy at any vicious, rabid, or distempered canine that may be trying to gnaw on your leg at any given moment.

Simply point this amazing new Scam Patrol Dog Zapper Raygun at the nearest pit bull, chow, rotweiller, doberman, or dalmation, and watch the red sonic ray strike and irritate the dog, making it rapidly arrive at the end of its endurance and leniency. Guaranteed to annoy the dog and that ought to show 'em that you mean business and don't want any growling or biting going on today.

DISCLAIMER: Whether or not you escape a dog attack, aggravated by any actions on your part, up to and including shooting this raygun at them, depends on how fast you can vanish into thin air with our Instant Invisibility Cape.

Get more zany gift ideas from that water soaked or half frozen Harriet Carter paper catalog that arrived in your physical mailbox, but you left there because it was so soggy and mushy, it seemed unfit to allow to enter your lovely and well apportioned home.

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